Saturday, December 29, 2012

Remembering Vanessa

Woman I can hardly express,
My mixed emotion at my thoughtlessness,
After all I'm forever in your debt,
And woman I will try express,
My inner feelings and thankfullness, - from "Woman", John Lennon

Each man's death diminishes me, - John Donne

I heard the news today, oh boy! My friend Vanessa passed away on December 26th.

A good friend even though not really really close. Real.  Because after living in the USA for nearly 20 years, she is one of only three American friends I've made here. Three American friends in 20 years. Some feat Van, as I am not the easiest person to get on with, and New York City is not the friendliest town out there.

But Van and I "got on", despite differences in cultural and socio-economic backgrounds, and religious beliefs. I like to think that is because we "knew" each other. And that sort of knowingness does not come often in this life and is to be valued. Yep, we were on the same wave-length.

So this posting is short. Vanessa contibuted to "Letter From New York" over the years in comments (mostly anonymous) and in a couple of postings under the pseudonym of "Jaded New Yorker".

2012 has been a bloody awful year. Let's hope 2013 will be better.

In memory of Vanessa I close my last posting of 2012 with my brother Tim's poem. Tim who also died of lung cancer (give up the cigs folks!), and who, like Vanessa, believed in the hope of peace and love.

beetroot to yourself
lettuce all get along
Bean so good getting to know you
Peas to you and all of your family


Lesley said...

There She Goes By Bye Bye. I made that record the day before she passed.
On Christmas Day Evening. In a space of a mere two months, I watched
my wife be consumed by cancer. It is a fate I would not wish on anyone,
not my worst enemy. Then there's the cancer itself. Cancer will not be cured, as long as the economical impetus to the medical industry as
we presently know it, stands to make money off of treating it, instead
of curing it. This is the 21st Century, we can make toast on the Moon.
We could do this too, and everyone knows it. All my wife could keep
saying was 'why me? this isn't right, this isn't fair.' And it wasn't. Not
at all by any stretch. It still isn't. My Bunny. She's Gone. I'm handling
his all very well they're telling me. And they say they know how I feel,
but no one knows, save Van watching over me now. She does know.
My friend. My companion. The girl who sat next to me on the school
bus up when we were in high school (that's how we met; she sat down,
and I was too shy to speak, so I sang out the window the whole ride).
That was in 1976. In 1986 we were married. 26 years we had.
Ups, and downs.. the whole nine yards. I was privileged beyond any
capacity to put into words personally. I became world famous, and
people around the world get to download our music for free,
and that only happened because Vanessa believed in me, in my mission
to put good music in the world, because it needs it, real bad.

Those who enjoy American Lesley Jane music,
and BEATLESEX music, may not know,
as they download sometimes literally hundreds of our songs,
for free mind you, that Saint Vanessa is the reason they can.
But she is, just the same.

I love you Bunny. I miss you so much. So very much,
but I am so glad you are out of pain, in a new young body,
have a sharp clear mind again, can be at ease in your new surroundings.

See you when I get there, Boo Bear. Oh I miss you.

Love, me.

Anonymous said...

We age, we die.
Some much too soon. For 42 years I have lived with the probability of instant death I have a bad heart and now I have only one third of it left. It works because of little birdcage things inserted in the shunts (bypass grafts) that were put in so many, many, years ago. I take many drugs to keep it working and am on my third pacemaker. Guess I'm lucky to have learned to live with impending death and learned to accept the fragility of life. I am sad for both of you.
As for re-incarnation? One of us is going to be very surprised.
Please accept my sincere sorrow in your losses.

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